THE BAYNE EXISTENCE

I fail at wrapping gifts.

It’s kind of embarrassing, actually.

You know that present that looks like someone cut off an entirely new strip of wrapping paper and then tried to match it up with the rest of the wrapping paper because they didn’t use enough to cover the present? And you’re thinking, ‘Yeah… you’re not fooling anyone here, pal. You really screwed the pooch on this one.’

That one’s from me.

Or, the gift that looks like someone used too much paper, and it’s all bulky at the sides with a crap ton of tape? And you blurt out, ‘Who the H wrapped this?’ then you struggle, to undo ALLLLLL the tape to the point where someone has to run and get a pair of scissors from the kitchen?

Eliza strikes again.

I used to just tell everyone that I had my 5 year old niece wrap their gift, which seemed precious and adorable. Until the cat was out of the bag that I didn’t actually have a 5 year old niece.

I’m just all thumbs in the arts and crafts department. I don’t know what the deal is. I’ve glued myself to more items of furniture than I’d like to mention, and I get sweaty palms when I see glitter and elbow macaroni.

So, I stick to gift bags.